A Mother’s Blink

August 14, 2014, I woke up to my 2-year-old son smiling at my face, and I had this strange feeling coming over me. This HUGE, wonderful, magnificent overwhelming feeling of gratitude, and love of motherhood.

I started to think about him and my then soon-to-be 8-year-old daughter, and I started to write this piece in my journal, titled “A Mother’s Blink”.
I waited to share and complete this today for my daughter’s birthday, and it is a coincidence that this weeks Tuesday at Ten prompt word is time, because that’s exactly what this is piece is about. About the fact that time goes by fast for our little ones, and it’s all done within a mother’s blink….

I was holding the positive pregnancy test in my hand…


Then I blinked (a mother’s blink)

Now, I’m nursing a 7lb 9oz baby girl while counting her perfect 10 fingers and 10 toes.

I blink (a mother’s blink)

She crawled! That little army crawl of hers, with her tongue sticking out, dragging her chubby little legs to the floor, and it took 9 months for her to figure that all out

But then, I blinked (a mother’s blink)

Now she smiles with those baby teeth showing, dancing around to the theme song of Mickey Mouse Club House on the Disney channel, “Come inside, it’s fun inside”, she sang. I laugh, smile and…….

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Blink (a mother’s blink)

She’s handing me crafts she made in preschool, of her letters, shapes, and colors. It’s messy of course, but I tell her it’s beautiful, because it’s art only a mother could love.

Now, my eye lids flutter, less than a second. (a mother’s blink)

The car seat’s gone, replaced by a booster seat, and the “big girl” bed has replaced the baby crib/toddler bed. This sign of growth, let’s this mommy know, my girl won’t stay small forever.

Oh, my darling McKenzie, I blink, (that mother’s blink)

And you’re going into your kindergarten class, with your over sized Hello Kitty pink backpack, telling me to put the camera away.

Camera’s down, and I blink (a mother’s blink)

I’m smiling, because she’s holding her newborn brother. Wow, she’s a big sister, with a big heart. She adjusts very easily into her new role, at 5 years old and…..

Brother and Sister

Of course I blink, (the mother’s blink)

And I’m homeschooling McKenzie, yet she’s teaching me. She’s teaching me patience, love, and fractions. lol Yes, fractions, and I’m glad that I can laugh about that today. She’s loosing “baby teeth”, and dreaming of the Tooth Fairy.

Oh, but I get it now, if I blink she grows, she stretches her little wings more, and more, ready to take flight.
If I blink, that mother’s blink, she’ll be running out the door with car keys in hand, and a quick wave of goodbye.

So, now I’m holding my eyes open, afraid to blink, afraid the years will go by like seconds.
Yes, I’m trying to keep them open, and it’s humanly impossible, for this momma not to blink, and humanly impossible for her not to grow.

So I do what I must. I blink, but this time it’s to blink away tears. Tears of realizations. Realizing that letting go is hard, realizing she must grow, realizing that I don’t have control over time, and realizing that it all happens….
In the blink of an eye, a mother’s blink.

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Today is my McKenzie’s 8th birthday. She is my helper, little friend, daughter of God, my sweet precious gift from above, my dark-haired beauty, born on a Saturday morning in 2006, you make this mother’s heart sing thanksgiving to an awesome Creator. This is for you, on your special day. 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

 

 

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Gossip: The Trust Breaker

This post is part of a Five Minute Friday linkup.  A one-word prompt is given and we write, freely, for five minutes, then post. This week’s prompt: TELL

We sat there laughing and talking enjoying us a hot cup of coffee.

Bonding over motherhood, and marriage.

We’re still in the stages of learning each other. Right now the friendship is fresh, easy and fun.

Then she starts telling me about her friends. The one of  that has a cheating husband, the one that is promiscuous, and the other that uses her credit card more than she should.

Yet, in her telling me about her friends,  I am getting to know her.

I know I can’t trust her. I know that I can’t confide the deepest parts of my heart to her, and that’s a sad fact because I really like her.

She’s witty, carefree and I see glimpses of a powerful God at work in her, but yet at this stage, at this point she can’t be trusted with my heart, with my secrets, with the conversations that make friendships stand strong.

She’s a gossip. A secret teller. A loose lips kinda gal.

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She tells the secrets that aren’t hers to tell, and spreads them like wildfire, causing pain and destruction to the ones being betrayed. 

I wish I can say that I’ve always been the woman who I am today, the woman who sits and sips her coffee with a tight lip and open heart, but I wasn’t. I use to love nothing more than a good story to gossip about. I took pleasure in knowing a secret, and even more pleasure in telling it to unapproved ears.

It’s the “telling” that breaks down the threads of  love and honor in the fabric of bonds formed in friendships, and womanhood.

It’s the telling that leaves unfinished puzzles of trust in the relationships.

Proverbs 11:13 says,A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.” (NIV) {stop}

 Reflections:  If you want to be a woman who builds up, that guards the heart of her friends, and a person of honor, then stop gossiping. I still need this as a  reminder because I’m human, and this use to be an area of true weakness for me. Gossip has become the approved sin. The lie, is that it’s not gossip if it’s on the cover of a magazine, or if the person is famous. Don’t be deceived. Gossip hurts deep, and more importantly God tells us not to.

 

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Link up here at Kate Motaug

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In the Interim of Empty

This post is part of a Five Minute Friday linkup.  A one-word prompt is given and we write, freely, for five minutes, then post. This week’s prompt: FILL

Filled, as soon as I read the prompt word, I am reminded of how empty I have been feeling lately.

Next, my thoughts immediately turn to the ending lyrics of a song by Hillsong called “Desert Song”. It says,

This is my prayer in the harvest

When favor and providence flow.

I know I’m filled to be emptied again

The seed I received I will sow.

It’s a song about seasons. The seasons of refinement, yet still finding reasons to praise God and declare His victory.

The lyrics at the end reminds me that the seasons change. There is a season of being filled, but only to be emptied again.

Tonight I want to dedicate the last few minutes of my 5 to discuss what happens during the season of pouring. Yes, pouring out our hearts into others.

See, we love the feeling of overflowing in favor and we often remember the goodness of the events that happen in that time, and we know what it feels like to be in the pit of emptiness, and we often know the hard circumstances in that season.

But what happens in the interim. How do we go from full to empty? Well, it doesn’t just happen overnight, well at least not for me. No it happens in the day-to-day service for His glory, the defeats of this world, yet the victories of His sweet conquers of our hearts.

filled

Pour by pour, my cup is getting low. It starts with the phone call of a dear friend receiving news that her dreams of child-bearing are being stripped from her body. You cover her in confident prayers, pouring out what He poured into you. You later weep for her in the privacy of your bedroom, you’ve taken on her desperation, yes your cup is getting low.

Sprinkle by sprinkle, it’s the smile of encouragement that you offer to a stranger that is desperately seeking some light in this world. You are on an appointment from God to tell them He is the Sun they seek, the One that brings light to the dark days. Next, you hear their burden story. Your heart breaks for them, because it breaks God’s heart too, yet He sent you to offer the hope of restoration. Now, my cup is getting lower.

Drip by drip, it’s the combat of negative family and friends. Fighting to stay positive just to be met by pessimistic outlooks. You share your dreams and desires, to give hope that they can come true. In return, you are only told of the obstacles rather than the finish line of success that keeps one motivated. Now, my cup is close to empty.

Now I’m coming to the end of my post, and to the end of my full. I’m feeling empty. Now it’s time to dive into the solitude of deep prayers with my Abba. I am safe there. I am secure there. I am at peace there. I’m being filled there.

Yes filled, only to pour Him out sprinkle by sprinkle, drip by drip, pour by pour into others, so that they may be filled with the Hope, Love that keeps me sustain.Signature

Link up here at Kate Motaug

#FMFParty

 

 

 

 

 

Bloom Like the Wildflowers…

This post is part of a Five Minute Friday linkup. A one-word prompt is given and we write, freely, for five minutes, then post. This week’s prompt: Bloom. 

My very first 5 minute Friday, and I am crazy excited….5 minutes starts now..LET’S GO!

I very recently went to visit my small hometown in Virginia for 2 weeks. It’s where I grew up, and I spent lots of days just driving around, taking in the beauty of rustic things, farmers equipment, open fields, dirt roads and old wooden buildings.

But among those things there were these little beauties uncontrollably growing, directing it’s attention to the sun, set apart, yet gathered with the weeds, blowing in the winds of peace, casting the beauty of it’s bloom…they were WILDFLOWERS. Where did they come from? No one planted them, no one watered them, no pruning, without care…yet they bloom wild, and free….

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Daugthers of the King, open up and bloom like the wildflowers…

Rise and grow from among the weeds, in the miracles of the Creator.

Point the petals of your hearts toward the Son (sun) of Glory.

Receive the rains of grace in the dry fields.

Be refreshed by the Living Water.

Be noticed as a reflection of His works.

Bloom like the wildflowers…

Grow in the words of the Father

When the summer storms come, with strong winds

Sway and bind under the freedom in His presence

You can not be uprooted, where He has planted you.

Your beauty is captivating, and the secrets of your seeds are from the Planter.

Bloom, you radiant daughters of the Mighty King

Open and bloom like the wildflowers…..

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Link up here Lisa Jo Baker

Please, if you copy and use these photos, give credit to me at Sowing Seeds in Them 🙂

 PICTURES THAT I TOOK OF WILDFLOWERS, WHILE I WAS IN VIRGINIA

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