Gossip: The Trust Breaker

This post is part of a Five Minute Friday linkup.  A one-word prompt is given and we write, freely, for five minutes, then post. This week’s prompt: TELL

We sat there laughing and talking enjoying us a hot cup of coffee.

Bonding over motherhood, and marriage.

We’re still in the stages of learning each other. Right now the friendship is fresh, easy and fun.

Then she starts telling me about her friends. The one of  that has a cheating husband, the one that is promiscuous, and the other that uses her credit card more than she should.

Yet, in her telling me about her friends,  I am getting to know her.

I know I can’t trust her. I know that I can’t confide the deepest parts of my heart to her, and that’s a sad fact because I really like her.

She’s witty, carefree and I see glimpses of a powerful God at work in her, but yet at this stage, at this point she can’t be trusted with my heart, with my secrets, with the conversations that make friendships stand strong.

She’s a gossip. A secret teller. A loose lips kinda gal.


She tells the secrets that aren’t hers to tell, and spreads them like wildfire, causing pain and destruction to the ones being betrayed. 

I wish I can say that I’ve always been the woman who I am today, the woman who sits and sips her coffee with a tight lip and open heart, but I wasn’t. I use to love nothing more than a good story to gossip about. I took pleasure in knowing a secret, and even more pleasure in telling it to unapproved ears.

It’s the “telling” that breaks down the threads of  love and honor in the fabric of bonds formed in friendships, and womanhood.

It’s the telling that leaves unfinished puzzles of trust in the relationships.

Proverbs 11:13 says,A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.” (NIV) {stop}

 Reflections:  If you want to be a woman who builds up, that guards the heart of her friends, and a person of honor, then stop gossiping. I still need this as a  reminder because I’m human, and this use to be an area of true weakness for me. Gossip has become the approved sin. The lie, is that it’s not gossip if it’s on the cover of a magazine, or if the person is famous. Don’t be deceived. Gossip hurts deep, and more importantly God tells us not to.



Link up here at Kate Motaug




5 thoughts on “Gossip: The Trust Breaker

  1. Wow Crystal. Thanks for this. Since motherhood or being married or what it is I don’t know- I’ve noticed the walls of integrity crumbling and the negativity seeping in and the sharing just enough of this or that to ‘not’ be gossiping. Just last night I sat with a girl over coffee and we talked of integrity and it’s been something God has been calling for in me to renew and refresh. I’m so glad your post was right before mine because I needed this reminder.
    To not be negative or disparaging (I feel like gossip is similar to that). Ironically, my FMF is pretty negative. Ha in a not ha kind of way right? I’m working on it.
    A call back to what is right and to integrity. To not let little snippets through in a quest to connect or be interesting or to let a wall of wisdom crumble.
    Thanks for this

  2. great post crystal. it’s a very important one too. seems gossip comes so easy to most of us. it takes time, thought and developing a dependence on God’s voice to keep those juicy secrets quiet. thanks for encouraging us to be women who can be trusted to keep confidences.

  3. Oh Crystal… this is so good… and true… and hard sometimes, yes! I love that you were learning things about her as she was talking… that is wisdom, my friend! I remember being a new Mama and wife and watching my sister… noticing that even when everyone else at the table would chime in with a story about their husband or child that was less than uplifting, with a sense of humor or raw emotion… she practiced that ‘tight lips and open heart’ that you mentioned! I am so thankful I learned that lesson early on and made it a practice in my own life! (Let’s not even go to the whole ‘prayer request’ gossiping… oh my! It’s such a thin line!) Great fmf post!

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